Taking care of yourself is one of the best things you can do for your health and happiness. And, I’m not just talking physically. I’m talking mentally, as well. Taking care of yourself is not selfish. You should not feel guilty about it. Indeed, you can’t take care of anybody else unless you have taken care of yourself. I see it all the time. You will burn out when you don’t take care of yourself. Why do so many of you put yourself last on the list to be taken care of? Is it an old mindset? There is no good reason to put yourself last.
Here are 10 signs you are not taking good care of your body and mind:
1. You’re easily frustrated in your relationships
You find yourself getting mad or snapping at others for no reason. You’re even surprised at how irritable you’ve become, and you worry the wrong people are taking the hit.
2. You’re more tired than energized throughout the day
You find yourself exhausted by noon.
3. You worry all the time, are on edge, and are easily agitated
You feel squeezed or compressed from all angles.
4. Your friends and loved ones are pulling away from you
You haven’t seen your friends in weeks and your family won’t return your calls.
5. You don’t feel creative and are lacking inspiration
You no longer want to try new things.
6. You don’t love doing the things you used to do
Everything bores you, and all you do is eat and sleep.
7. You are abandoning your desires and dreams
Instead, you put your partner’s (and everyone else’s) first.
8. You are not able to understand how your behavior affects yourself and others
People are scared to talk to you because of how much you lash out.
9. Your actions don’t line up with your desires and dreams
You don’t care about your goals and ambitions anymore.
10. You rely on caffeine, painkillers, or wine to get you through the day
If these 10 things sound familiar to you, then it’s time to recharge your batteries. Your body is like a car, it needs fuel to run. When a car runs out of fuel, it will stop and so will you. The better you treat yourself, the better you will feel. This will help when things are difficult. It also helps with your attitude.
Here are 5 ways to feel better:
1. Talk to family and friends
It helps to talk to others when you are feeling down or overwhelmed. If you’re ready, leap and meet with a counselor or life coach. They can help you clarify how you are feeling and what to do next.
2. Take a vacation or go on a retreat
This will help you feel calm. It will also satisfy your need for adventure. These days you don’t have to spend a lot of money. With a little research, you will find the perfect getaway. Remember, this is a vacation. Which means you are not checking your phone every 5 minutes. If possible, shut it off.
3. Purge and then rebuild
Clutter is not good for the mind. It’s also not good for the people around you. When you let go of the old, you make room for the new. I’m not just saying get rid of the physical stuff around you. Maybe, it’s time to let go of some toxic relationships or people in your life. You can also let go of bad memories and negative thought patterns, you hold on to. Surround yourself with things and people you love.
4. Socialize and connect with others
As human beings, we all desire to connect with others. Go to new events. Say “yes” to an invitation, when you would normally say “no.” It’s important to try new things. If you haven’t heard from your family or friends in a while. Take the initiative and invite them out. You could go out for dinner or go to a concert.
5. Be honest with yourself
Whose fault is it that you aren’t taking care of yourself? One of the beautiful things about being a human being is our ability to change course when we desire. If you aren’t feeling fulfilled, this is a great way to start living the life you have always wanted.
Lianne Avila is a licensed marriage and family therapist with a practice in San Mateo, CA. Her work has been featured in Psych Central, BRIDES, and Prevention.